Get Off the Couch...

Get on the floor. (Everybody walk the dinosaur?) This is something I love doing with my kids. It lets me play with them at their level instead of making them come to me. Sometimes I lie on the floor and let Caitlin crawl all over me. Other times, we all settle in for a living room picnic. We play with dolls, walking them through pillow parks and along blanket trails, making little doll beds out of those same pillows and blankets. We build amazing forts. We climb in boxes. We also find all the dust bunnies that aren't so visible from up above.

Girls vs Boys

Victoria likes to label the boys and the girls. "Daddy is a boy and Grandpa is a boy. You me and Caitlin are girls." Today I asked her how she knows who's a boy and who's a girl. She thought about it for a bit and said "girls drive cars and boys drive trucks. Boys go to work while girls stay home with the kids." Indoctrinating my daughter into the world of gender stereotypes? Check!

Eyelashes

Bedtime is my snuggle time with Caitlin. This is when the two of us head into her room to cuddle in the glider rocker. I get her tucked into her sleep sack and settled comfortably on my lap (we have a special arrangement of pillows that helps us out). We dim the lights and close the door. For these few moments, it is just the two of us. No older sister, no chores, no tv, no computer. Just the two of us, enjoying an amazing closeness. At first, she is a bit restless, sometimes sitting up, sometimes just trying to nuzzle into me, in just the right way. Slowly, she moves a bit less, though her little hands still grab at me, periodically, just to let me know she isn't quite ready to sleep just yet. For my part, I simply look at her. I look at the way her amazing red hair sits just perfectly on her forehead. The curve of her cheek, her button nose, her peachy-pink skin. The way her eyelashes feather across her butter-soft skin.

Happy St Patrick's Day!

I took this photo from our yard, last night after 6 pm sometime. It was a bit early but I figure it still must be good luck since it occurred less than 6 hours before St. Patrick's Day. You could actually see both ends, as well as the outer "double" rainbow and if I had been a bit more on the ball I bet I could have found that pot o' gold.

But Where's the Bird?

Kids are funny. We all know this. Here are two recent examples, courtesy of Victoria.

1. We had friends over for dinner, one of whom is a bit of a trickster. This evening, he points out the window and says "Look at that bird Victoria." She eagerly looks out the window while he steals her plate (what is with boys needing to do this? My dad used to love this trick!). When she looks back she notices that her plate is missing but is totally unconcerned, asking, "but where's the bird Jim? Where's the bird?" The point of this trick is totally lost on her, but none the less she realizes something is up since we are all laughing. Someone tries to get her into the spirit of things by encouraging her to take Jim's plate. She's a good sport and with tons of enthusiasm yells "Look! A bird." Jim "looks" and she very quickly steals her own plate and hides it.

2. Later that evening Scott is watching football. It is Victoria's bedtime and she's asking if Dad can put on one of her shows for a few minutes before she hops into bed. Jim, who along with Scott is a bit of an obsessive sports fan, tries to turn her off of this idea saying "but this is your show." (Really? Is she that stupid? I don't think so.) Victoria very promptly, and somewhat condescendingly, informs Jim that no, "this is Caitlin and Dad's show." Hehehe. When Caitlin was brand new Scott used to spend lots of time watching football and bouncing on the exercise ball with herwhen we were trying to put Caitlin to sleep. (Don't judge - this seriously seemed to calm her down. Football puts me to sleep too.) Now, it will forever be Caitlin's sport.

Yep, I'm a Mom

Things I hear come out of my mouth that can only mean I'm officially a mom:

• Put on a sweater; you'll catch a cold.
• You can't go outside with wet hair; you'll catch a cold.
• You don't need to yell. I'm right here.
  
• I'm going to count to three....
• Don't make me come in there.
• Shhhhh.... Not so loud.
• Go to your room! Now!
• Hop to it. (Usually, she hops like a bunny after I say this. Kinda cute)
  
• If you get out of your bed one more time.... (I'll do what?)
  
• You can't get down from the table until you finish three more bites.
• Be nice to your sister.
• Answer me when I ask you a question.
• Pick that up. Now!
• Get off of there!
  
• No playing with balls in the house.
• Don't just throw your coat on the floor.
• Go ask your dad.
• Don't talk with your mouth full.
• Does it look like we're there yet?
• You can't know you don't like it if you haven't tasted it.
• If you're too full to finish your dinner then you're too full for dessert.
• Yeah, well life's not fair.

My Girls

Victoria's Story

Caitlin's Story

Wildlife Park

We have been enjoying some amazing weather recently and decided today to go to the Wildlife Park. We packed a picnic, bundled up the girls and off we went. We checked out snakes, got up-close with an owl and saw two crazy peacocks (I totally did not know that peacocks can fly into trees). We marveled at the size of the buffalo and watched a bear nap in the sun. Victoria's favorite part was, of course, the train. In the end, we skipped the picnic since a breeze came up and even with beautiful weather it was not ideal for sitting around. I'm thinking about heading back over Easter.

A Little One-on-One With My Little One

Today I had an opportunity to spend a bit of one-on-one time with Victoria. I don't think we've had that kind of time together since before Caitlin was born. Usually, if I have someone looking after the kids it is because I need to accomplish something or take one of them to an appointment. Today though, my mother-in-law came in and looked after Caitlin so that Victoria and I could go on a "date" and just enjoy each others company.

We went swimming, which Victoria loved. She is so confident in the water and would have stayed there all day. It was extra nice at the pool since there were hardly any people there, probably because of an event that was taking place, taking up all the parking spots.

After swimming we went out for lunch together. I always marvel at how grown up Victoria can be, when she chooses too. After we were seated the waitress came around and Victoria informed her that she would have an apple juice, a pepperoni pizza and french fries please. When we were ready to go and the waitress was clearing our plates Victoria let her know that she would like to take the rest of her food home, so that she could finish it later. We had an enjoyable conversation while we ate, punctuated by lots of cuddles, silly noises and kisses. Victoria was clearly on her best behaviour (listening when I asked her to sit down and not stare at the other diners) and kept saying "I really like our date Mom. We're having so much fun, aren't we?"

The best part of our date, for me, was being able to put aside all of my obligations and to-do lists and just enjoy the company of my daughter. By making the day about her and not trying to accomplish anything, I was able to step outside of time and just enjoy the wonderful little girl that my daughter has become.

The Poor Lonely Cheese

Off The Mark Cartoons

In the car today we were singing The Farmer in the Dell (as we are prone to do) and when we got to the big finish we happily sang about how "the cheese stands alone." At this, Victoria, in a moment of beautiful 3-year-old empathy, says "the poor cheese is probably lonely. He doesn't want to be by himself. I wish the others would all got stand with him"

Do you remember when you were in school and played the Farmer in the Dell? For whatever reason, the cheese was always the most popular role at my school. I'm not sure why. I can't even remember exactly how to play the game, though I'm pretty sure if you are the cheese you stand in the middle of the circle and dance by yourself. All by your poor lonely self.

So Sweet, and So Annoying

Around midmorning today, as I was snuggled in the rocking chair with Caitlin, cuddling her to sleep while basking in the soft sunlight, I was startled out of my dreamy bliss by a monstrous Victoria banging open the door and loudly growling "I LOVE YOU MOMMY!" over and over again. Caitlin's little eyes fly open and we both jump a bit. How can the sweetest words ever, from the sweetest little 3-year-old ever, be so annoying and yet still so cute?

Boot Scootin Boogie

Victoria has given up shoes. When I try to put them on (any shoe, too big, too small or just right) she loses her mind, kicking and screaming that they hurt her feet. She will only wear boots. I've tried pointing out that runners are better for running in (hence the name?) and that boots will be too hot in summer, but she assures me that they won't be too hot and she can run just fine in boots.

I'm clearly just going to have to wait this one out. Pick my battles, right?

An Abstract Concept

This picture was taken shortly after Scott and I got married - about 2 years BV (before Victoria)

This morning Victoria and I were looking at pictures of Scott and me before Victoria was born. Victoria asked who was looking after her and I said that no one was - it was before she was born. What a hard concept to grasp when you are three!

V - But where was I Mommy?

Me - Nowhere - there was no Victoria yet.

V - But where WAS I Mommy?

Me - You didn't exist yet.

V - Was I with Grandma?

Go Canada!

I have a guilty secret.... I'm not all that excited by the Olympics. Maybe I'd be a bit more enthusiastic if it wasn't always on as soon as my husband comes home from work. Or, maybe if I wasn't inundated with Olympic updates/prayers every time I log into Facebook. Having said that, I'm pretty darn proud to be a Canadian woman right now. We are kicking butt! Seriously. Out of the 17 medals Canada currently has 13.5 of them went to the women. We're just showing those boys how it's done.

It's Official.....

We have a crawler!

Pretty Pink Stars

Do I teach my daughters to colour inside the lines and that stars are generally yellow, or do I step back and allow them to make the stars beautiful however they choose?

My Mirror

Victoria is my reflection. Today she was talking to her train (built out of pillows in her bedroom) and I very clearly heard myself. I'm not sure if I like this reflection or not.

Victoria yelling to her train: "I am so disappointed in you! You were supposed to go to the North Shore and you just didn't listen! We were having a very nice day and now by not listening you are making me mad and now the day isn't fun any more. Bad train! I need you to pay attention to me when I tell you to go to the North Shore. Listen to me! I am so not impressed."

Now Presenting....

I'm trying really hard (not always succeeding, but still trying) these days to be "present" with my children. I'm aiming to stay "in the moment" with my girls, instead of doing my usual multi-tasking mom stuff.

Right now I am playing on the computer, planning what to have for dinner and thinking about the cleaning that I have to do still. And Victoria is cuddling with me on the couch while she snuggles her toy elephant and enjoys some popcorn while watching a cartoon on TV. In light of my new presentness goal, I'm going to put the computer down, cuddle the heck out of my little girl and simply revel in how good it feels to hold her.

NOTE: After posting the previous I spent time being present with Victoria. We coloured, we sang, we played with her sticker book. She was incredibly sweet and well behaved. Actually, the rest of the day went really smoothly, with me remembering to stay in the moment and not trying to do it all, all at the same time.

Maybe there is something to this "being present" idea.....

Three's the Place to Be

Today my biggest little girl turned. Three. Holy smokes, she's three. TH-REE. 3. It seems like it was only yesterday that I was meeting her for the first time, holding her in my arms and wondering at how my life was going to change with this new little life. And change it did! I new that things would be different and I totally expected to love my little girl, but never, ever, could I have imagined the all-encompassing love I would feel for her. The depth of my love. I delight in her every small accomplishment. I feel her pain with every small scrape and bump and I cry along with her when her feelings are hurt. I feel that mother-bear protective instinct and have to hold myself back from tearing into anyone or anything that hurts her tender feelings. Even knowing intellectually that she is far from perfect, when I look at her my heart swells and all I see is perfection. She is my miracle in the form of a little girl

V-Day

I have been feeling a bit desperate to get out of the house without my little ones and tonight, thanks to my mother-in-law, my husband and I went out for dinner ALL BY OURSELVES. No kids. Now admittedly, our reservation was for 5:15 so it wasn't exactly a late night experience, and we spent lots of time talking about the little ones, but we dressed up, sat for a lovely meal that included wine, appetizers and dessert, and even went out for coffee afterward. I loved having the chance to reconnect with my husband and remember all the many, many reasons why I love him.

When we got home at around 8:00 (Caitlin still likes to eat every three hours and absolutely refuses a bottle) I was excited to see my little girl and was holding her above my head and kinda twirling her around. And she spit up. A lot. In my mouth. Happy Valentine's Day Mom!

Trip to the Park

Today we chose to enjoy the beautiful, if a bit cloudy, January weather. We took the girls to the Westsyde Park to feed the animals and check out the ice on the river. Scott and Victoria did a bit of ice dancing and some "curling" with rocks on the ice. Can't argue with +5 degree weather in January!

It's Just a Phase

I have to remember that kids go through lots of little phases. LOTS of phases and stages. I forget this all the time and panic when they seem to be moving into a bad stage. As soon as we enter a "bad" phase I completely forget that I have good kids.

Example: Caitlin is great at going to bed. She wakes up every three hours but is super easy to get back to sleep. However..... recently she's been really hard to put down. She wants to be cuddled and snuggled and lies there as if she is sleeping, right up until you try to put her down, when she loses her mind and screams her head off. It is wearing me down, even though it has only been going on for two nights. For seven months my sweet baby girl has been pretty easy to put to bed and after two nights I have completely forgotten about that and I am second guessing myself and asking "where have I gone wrong?"

During moments of perspective I know my girls are amazing and oh so very good, but all it takes is a blip on their perfect little paths for me to start worrying that perhaps we've taken a wrong turn. I need to get over this because I think we've got a lot of stages ahead of us, both good and bad.

I'm her best mommy.

So today in the car Victoria and I were talking about the fact that she cried an awful lot this morning, for no particular reason.

Me: Victoria, you sure seemed sad this morning.

V: Yeah, I was.

Me: Why were you so sad?

V: Because I didn't have anyone around to make me happy

Me (trying to ensure she turns out to be a strong, independent girl): You don't need anyone else to make you happy. You can make yourself happy.

V: I know, but sometimes it just feels good to have a little help. I just needed some extra love.

Me: I love you Victoria

V: I love you too. You're my best mommy.

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This evening I could hear Victoria yelling in the living room while I was clearing away the dinner dishes. I asked her what was the problem and she told me she was frustrated because she couldn't remember how to play the card game. Not sure what she was talking about, I asked her if she meant the animal card game that she sometimes plays with Grandma. She let me know that "No Mom, I mean that I can't remember the rules for my pretend card game and it is making me frustrated. Grrrrrrr!" Seriously? She's upset because she can't remember how to play an imaginary card game and she is the only player? Kids are funny.